The birth of a first child begins a life-changing journey for parents.  Now our child is here, physically, in our arms, eyes reflecting eternity back at us.  We learn as we go what to do in each new and often unimagined circumstance.    For new parents, there has usually been little or no practice, training or hands on preparation.  We can only move forward with trust.

Choosing to trust in ourselves as parents is a lifelong practice, with many milestones along the way.  Each time we encounter a new developmental stage or transition in our child’s life, we must renew that trust in our ability to intuit what is right for us and our child(ren) and to make and apply the best choices we can at the time.  Today I came across a profound quote by a midwife who pioneers peaceful birth education, and I am reminded of one the most fundamental and impact full “stages” in a child’s life: birth.

“We can positively influence our future by giving birth to our babies consciously. We can have a prosperous and safe civilization in just one generation if we dramatically reduce the limbic imprint of pain and suffering.” ~Elena Tonetti

The manner in which we approach and give birth influences our child’s subconscious response to the world.  When we approach birth consciously choosing to trust ourselves, our bodies, and the process of birth, we pass on that trust to our child.  The brain, the entire nervous system, is imprinted with a pattern–an energy–of trust, openness and ease.  Giving birth to babies consciously doesn’t mean we can or will control the outcome of the birth.  It means we choose to trust the process and give birth with the most presence and awareness we possibly can.  It means we practice trusting our body and it’s innate ability to birth naturally.

I realize that birth can be a very touchy subject, especially among women who have had birth experiences which differed from what they had intended, and/or were extremely difficult or traumatic.  Therefore, I want to stress that it’s important to continue to trust the process and experience of birth no matter what, no matter how your birth happens.  While many women choose to have a natural/non-intervention birth and do indeed have an amazing experience of conscious, peaceful, uninhibited birth, others who choose this must allow a change of course when medical intervention becomes necessary.  And that is all part of the process of trust and acceptance.

I believe what Elena is referring to by birthing our babies consciously has to do not only with creating the most natural, drug-free, intervention-free (as often as possible) birth, but also with our whole approach to life itself.  If we expect pain and suffering, we will get it.  If we approach the world from a place a fear and resistance, we are setting ourselves up for pain and suffering, and we are teaching that to our children.  On the other hand, if we approach life, including the birth of our children, with trust, acceptance and openness, we are setting ourselves up for resilience, love and freedom, while modeling that to our children.  And, no matter the outcome of our children’s birth, when we approach birth with trust and acceptance, we pass that on to our child on a fundamental level.

Trusting birth creates a pattern of trust in our lives and the lives of our children.  It is one of the most amazing gifts we can give to ourselves and our children.  This trust is rooted in our connection to Spirit.  Remembering Spirit in parenting, including birthing, establishes a foundation of trust in our lives that profoundly influences our children’s ability to live and thrive on all levels.