Teaching Peace Relationship, Spirit And Parenting - May 23, 2011

teaching

As our almost 2 year old begins to express language more and more, and demonstrate what he knows and learns, I am sometimes in awe as I observe this big being in a little body.  His very honest and present expression of his feelings and emotions continues to amaze and humble me.  I love how he can be so intensely sad and hurt one moment, after bumping his head on a door, then after a good 2 minute cry in my arms, he is pointing and giggling about a squirrel, or contentedly observing life.  He doesn’t hold back, and he stays in the moment.  What a great teacher!

While I am grateful for all the opportunities my child gives me to learn and grow each day, I also consider how and what he is learning from me each day.  What am I modeling?  What are my actions and responses to emotions teaching my child?  What is he learning from me that I may not even be aware of actively teaching him?  As parents, the most fundamental “lesson” we give our children every day, every moment, is our awareness.

Our most profound gift to our children may simply be our presence, consciousness, and awareness.  This is obviously not something tangible that can be measured or proven.  Rather, it is a idea to allow ourselves to accept and own: what we teach and pass on to our children is, first and foremost, an energetic structure of thought and Beingness.  Our children can either choose to accept or resist the energy they observe in us.  They can match and learn from the energy and awareness we offer them by our presence, or they may resist and recreate for themselves the energy and awareness that suits them.

If we choose to make our inner, spiritual life a priority for us as parents, we can do this with the knowledge that the more at peace and in a space of love we are, the more loving and peaceful our interactions with our children will be, and the more we will be teaching peace and demonstrating love.  There are certainly active ways in which we teach our children, like tying shoes, saying “thank you,” washing dishes.  But more often what and how we teach is by example, by how we are Being, by our state of awareness.  Are we at peace with ourselves, loving and forgiving ourselves?  Or are we constantly at war with ourselves, having an internal battle of self-blame, judgment, resentment or regret?  Do we hold onto things, or let go and move on?  Are our thoughts encumbered by worry and fear, or focused on gratitude and Love.  How we are Being is what we are teaching.

When our child experiences difficulty with something, has a challenging moment or day, the first step we can take to help them is a step within us.  We can become grounded and centered, breathe, and allow our awareness to expand and show us the most loving response, the most peaceful solution.  Maintaining a space of conscious awareness with our children models presence and gives children the space and permission to have their awareness in their body.  It is a profound gift, to both our children and ourselves.


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